I am struggling to extend love to depression. It feels like depression is anti-gravity and deflects all attempts at joining or welcome. Perhaps the energy of depression is non-attractive? Is it actually repelling? It feels more like zero gravity or exactly center on the spectrum of gravity. Is this stillness??? This is interesting. Stillness is that quality of love that simply abides quietly. What if we could allow depression as stillness? What a difference in our (my) reaction to depression. After a new baby is born we might experience post-partum stillness. One might be able to express their depths simply by saying “I am in a deep stretch of stillness, don’t worry.” What if the stillness of depression was exactly what it was designed to do?
Think of the gifts stillness has to offer: quiet, lack of frenzy, zero tasks, time, awareness of self, blessed lack of awareness of the world, and time and quiet enough to hear your own voice.
Depression as stillness is yet another state of being, not cause for alarm. What if I revered and honored depression as an on purpose time of going deeply within?
HS, I truly appreciate this way of seeing and it helps tremendously yet what about the pain and suffering of depression? Is it like a gravity chamber until you quit fighting then the stillness is revealed?
Can you specifically address the fear of the way out (that it feels too difficult) in the “21 Fear Salute”?
HS: Dearest One,
It feels so heavy and difficult because you feel like you are the one that must solve this thing called depression. It is nothing to be solved. It is a time of slowed-down being so that you may recognize yourself.
Spend this time noticing your own self without judgment; are you tired, lethargic, leaden?
Extending Love To My Thoughts
Are the birds chirping outside your window or do you hear traffic sounds? Is your chair squishy or hard? Is your bed sweet smelling or do the sheets need a wash? Notice your thoughts. You do not have to do anything to your thoughts. You needn’t admonish them, be frightened by them or be proud of them. They are neutral. Thoughts are neutral.
You may relate to them any way you like: this is what creates your experience. You can relate to your thoughts with fear or with love. Using fear is always an energy drain because your nature is love so using fear forces an unnatural dampening or tapping down of energy.
Love is who and what you are when you set the fear down long enough to notice. As you begin to practice noticing your self try to set aside five minutes each morning to begin with.
Take several deep breathes. Then one more breath and let it out very slowly. During this five minutes welcome all noticing. Imagine you will get $100 for every thought, feeling or sensation you notice.
Now, simply welcome the power of noticing with open arms for noticing is the beginning of awareness. It is enough.
