I read today these known words in a book I randomly picked up off my bookshelf: “If thou canst but believe; all things are possible to him who believes.” It is the crux of opening up to success of any kind. And it bloody annoys me. It stirs up in me anger, hurt and shame because I again wonder, “Why and how could I have forgotten who and what I am?”
This is what is being forgiven in my extending love to the fear of success. This deep angry, annoyed, entitled shame. Shame, not that I allowed the forgetting, but that I am caught out. I could not outwit, outmaneuver, out-vex the Love that I am. I cannot/could not fly below the radar enough, close my eyes tightly enough, ignore the truth enough to be a success at not-love. Bollocks and damn it. I am again found out.
Will I ever strop trying to forget, ignore, deny and try to separate from the whole, pure, unadulterated Love that I am? Will you? This too, is part of me; this absolute lack of desire to integrate the Love that I am into all I do, say and think. That is ok. Nothing is wrong.
HS: Be as you are. It too has a greater purpose than you know; it is intended that you remain at your post until you, and you alone, desire the Homecoming. Be not afraid. I am still with you.
Fear not beloved one, this ancient pain is for your blessing too. It is all coming to you for acknowledgment and blessing to firm and grow your celestial awareness. Fear not.
I am the one who integrates all-that-is. You simply allow, welcome, appreciate and are grateful for that-which-is-already-happening.
Me: Do I need to do/say anything?
HS: Do, be, say, exactly as your heart directs. You are already part of our All. Fear not my sister, all is well and deliciously perfect.
Me: You’re kind of scaring me. What’s up?
HS: Integration awareness of the highest order. All is well. All is most certainly well. What are you noticing right now?
I am a child of God.
Me: Confidence, strength, broad perspective, like standing on a mountain top. Warm melty feelings on my head and face, slowed heart beat……peace, but a different quality of peace. Peace that feels solid, strong, standing still in the power that I am (rather than the feeling of escaping into an open meadow). Peace that is settled, mighty even. A pinnacle, mountaintop head. All is well is playing in the background, a strong swell of victorious voices but at a distance. All is quiet where I am. Utterly quiet. I need not fear for I am fear too. My purpose revealed will see me through to the end.
I am Goliath & David; Samson & Delilah, Bert & Ernie. I am all of creation and need not fear this wholeness and truth.
I am purpose built for myself.
All is well.
All is most certainly well.
